Opinion Piece

I did a thing this week. I left the comfy confines of my bedroom to go to the cinema. From one dark room to another.  My flatmates and I decided on The Guest, because it was the only film that we could all agree on. (I vetoed anything supernatural, and Ben vetoed anything with Cameron Diaz in) ((Soz Cam)). The advert didn't really give to much away, other than that there was a guest, and I'm pretty sure we figured that out from the title, but it was the only thing that no one was completely opposed to so that was that. To mine and everyone else's surprise, it was super super good. Picking up all the good parts of 80s thriller cinema, mixing it with contemporary camera work and setting it to a heavily stylised soundtrack made for a stunning experience. Now, I won't go as far to say the film didn't have flaws. There was a definitely lull halfway through and it seemed all predictable and I was ready to write the film off as a bad'en. There were also some very interesting moments of pure psychotic cheese in the way of lingering shots of crazy stares. But you get past this and it's suddenly a back catalogue of all the good-cheesy thrillers and horrors of yesteryear.  Also, in a much more shallow review, I would comment on how creepily hot the protagonist is, something endearing about psychotic guys who can carry beer kegs with ease, am I right? I would give it a good 6 or 7/10. 

Source: http://www.sundance.org/images/filmguide/2014/13890-1.jpg

Fall Out Boy are riding the comeback wave, still, with their new track 'Centuries'. Who am I to tell 'em to get off the metaphorical surf board? Many, many moons ago a 16 year old me legitimately wept at the news the band were going on hiatus. Four years later, a supposedly more cool version of me, who had completely shelved the idea of them returning, wept once more at the news of their return. So it's safe to say that I'm a little biased. I just love 'em. They remind me of being a kid with no responsibilities other than checking online updates everyday for Pete Wentz' hair. I have no regrets. Anyway, returning once more only just after they returned for the first time (breath), they have a new song and good golly, a new album on the way. I tuned into Zane Lowe's show on Radio One (BBC) to hear the very first play of the new track + interview, because I'm a uni student with nothing better to do on a Monday night. It took me a couple of listens I must admit. I didn't dislike it but I wasn't wowed either. Days have passed, songs have been played and I am now a full fledged lover of this tune. Listen below, fo'reals. It's totally dramatic.

From singles to albums, there's been one album that I have become addicted to. I'm not convinced I can actually start my day without listening to it. It's Banks' new release 'Goddess'. Bit of a tonal shift from FOB, but a gooden nonetheless. It's equally dramatic and full of cleverly written lines that you desperately want to passively indirect tweet at people. The album in full is honestly an exhibition in versatility, from haunting, stripped piano ballads, to intense electronic layers. It's beautiful. I feel like I'm at full goddess status when I'm strutting myself to work listening. My fave songs are Brain, Drowning, Goddess and pretty much every single song on the damn album. 

This next bit o' news is the best damn news I have heard all damn year. It's a well needed bit of news in today's world too. That wonderful news is that Gilmore Girls will be on Netflix in October, every single episode. Damn. I'm so ruddy excited, honestly it's made my year. As I turn 21 in October it is clearly an early birthday present to me, from my very good pal Mr Netflix (we spend every weekend together).  I'm not 100% sure how I'm going to function in day to day life now I'll have all this new telly watching, it doesn't look promising for my third and final year at university, whoops. Now I can spend every Sunday tucked up watching Lorelai and Rory, just wishing I had birthed a child at 16 and we had become bezzie pals. If you haven't got Netflix already, now is the time to get that first month free, I'm telling you. 

So that's what has happened this week that is of any interest to me, so is now of possibly some interest to you. I urger you to see/listen/enjoy these things, or just carry on as you were. Because I said so. 

Corners of the Capital: St. Katherine's Dock

Summer is over. The sky is grey. You google last minute holidays. There is hope. There is sunshine. You see the price. Hope is lost. You have a glass of wine. You forget you live in Britain for a small amount of time. (Replace the word 'You' with 'I').
It may have been a pretty bloomin' awful for August this last week, but there are still exhausted rays of light emitting from the sun! If, like me, you can't afford that last minute getaway abroad to see the last of the summer, then you'll just have to make do with every second of sunshine you can get! Because we can't afford to travel abroad we've gotta find the next best thing and I think I may have found it. I'm talking full on French Riviera realness with added English weather for your summer at the tucked away St. Katherine's Dock.

It's located at the North base of Tower Bridge, because you know, when you want to forget what country you're in why not go to one of the most iconic London landmarks. Have a couple of glasses of wine and I'm sure it looks like any old bridge (probably not). But St.Katherine's Dock does host a few little spots for you to drink this wine and set your peepers on the nice big yachts docked that you can't afford. Zizzis have a restaurant there, offering up chill italian vibes with their garden overlooking the dock so you can eat and watch the little men paddle boarding at the same time. (Don't pretend you don't wish them to fall in, don't even try).

My flatmate and I decided to have a wander around the place, mainly because it was the closest Starbucks (forgive me). Nothing says holiday abroad like trying to find your closest amenities, am I right? As Starbucks' go, this one is pretty snazzy. Ignore your feelings about the company themselves and just enjoy this little dome of caffeinated pleasure! We took our drinks (non-alcohol, shocking), outside as they have outdoor seating, the place is too adorbs.

It's hard to imagine life without a yacht, so we sat and planned what one we'd own and what we'd do with it. It's a fun yet tragic game. Much like planning out what you'd buy if you won the lottery, half the fun is just imagining. So you can sit in amongst these massive vessels of dollar and imagine yourself sitting out in some far away marina, relaxed on your holiday, with nothing but the echo of London to remind you of home.

Dotting about Europe on your imaginary holiday you can visit Holland! The Dickins Inn, though very Britishly named, does have a very Holland-y look about it. Might be something to do with all the flowers. But if you don't want to pop your clogs at the sight of it then nothing will please you. Literally nothing.

So there is my little treat for you unexplorey types. I've done the exploring, all you have to do is go enjoy it. It's possibly the closest thing to going on holiday you can get without spending any dollar (minus oyster top up) ((and/or your drink of choice)). You should definitely go and feel not in London whilst being in London, because I said so.

Corners of the Capital: National Selfie Gallery

What do we want? SELFIES! When do we want them? ALWAYS! 

What can I say, we're a generation that loves a cheeky self portrait. Nothing better than catching yourself on a good face day at the right angle and being able to show all your peers how fabulous you look. There just isn't, don't fight me on this one. One dares not to think of how we all survived without the front facing camera. In fact, one dares not to think about how we got on without phones, camera and technology at all! FEAR NOT. They did get on without them and they were still able to show off their fabulous faces to all their peers and colleagues the same- in painting form!
I'm talking about the ancestor of the beloved selfie, the self portrait! Where better to go and marvel and worship our love for anything face than at the National Portrait Gallery in good ol' London town.

(Source:  ART X SMART by Kim Dong-kyu- super talented artist, check 'em out)

Admittedly, this analogy doesn't completely work because they're mostly not self portraits, but they're faces nonetheless. Faces that would have commissioned to capture good angles, had a cheeky bit of paintbrush-airbrushing and changed a few bits photoshop style but on canvas. Sound like anything we know? Of course, we all know it too well.

If you wander your butt upstairs at the gallery you'll find the more historical sections or, if you choose to see it that way, the section where all the selfies have the used the sepia instagram filter. Nothing looks more dramatic than the muted tones of history. Plus with no other media or technology available to help create the pieces, y'all know the person had to sit in front of the artist for hours upon hours to get the painting right. Now, I know the perfect selfie can take a while to find, apparently it takes up around 16 minutes of your day, but sitting for an old school portrait is full on dedication. We salute you!

(Source:  ART X SMART by Kim Dong-kyu)

If the stairs don't take your fancy stay downstairs for the more up-to-date section, which is up-to-date with the latest selfie trends, don't ya know. Don't deny it, we've all tried to take that perfect seflie, the one where you pretend to be asleep like 'The bae caught me sleeping again...' (bae = before anyone else) ((obvs)). You've tried it, I've tried it, admitting is the first step. Well, that pretty good looking fella from the football (eww), David Beckham, has one-upped us.  Massive thanks to Sam Taylor-Wood (that same director who is bringing us 50 shades galore!), we get to see David Beckham sleeping, in real-time. The piece originally called 'David' is quite the sight to behold. Everybody crack out your tripods and have a go at a full on sleep selfie video.

Source: www.pinterest.com/pin/33495590951975921/

How far would you go to capture the essence of you? Winner for the most dedicated selfie ever has to go to Marc Quinn. What's Marc done that we haven't? I hear you asking... You may have dedicated much of your life to finding your perf angle but this guy, this guy Marc Quinn, has created the ultimate three dimensional blood portrait of himself, usefully titled 'Self'. Eight pints of his own blood and liquid silicone, yummy. He even has to update it with more blood every now and again. Go check that out, it's bloody brilliant (I couldn't help myself).

© Marc Quinn. Photography by Todd-White Art Photography, courtesy White Cube, London

Imagine a time before the front-facing camera existed, I know it's difficult. But there was a time when any good selfie had to be taken in the mirror, creating the selfie-ception effect. (If you're struggling to remember, go look on your old Myspace and I'm sure you'll find what I'm talking about. This year's BP Portrait Award houses the painting equivalent of just that! It's all paint-ception in Tim Hall's painting 'Henrietta and Ollie'.

Henrietta and Ollie by Tim Hall, 2014
© Tim Hall

So yeah, visit the National Portrait (Selfie) Gallery to really feel the history of making face. On a serious note, this year's BP Portrait Exhibition is super amazing and will make you question the ability of your own hands! It's genuinely one of my favourite spots in London and you'll often find me wasting hours, peacefully walking around taking it all in. The latest BP exhibition is open until 21st of September so try to visit before it's over, it's free!! Go and do it because I said so.

How to Survive: Freshers

So I went to my SU bar last night and whilst I was sitting there in my jelly shoes with my legs unshaven and discussing that being on the Great British Bake Off is probably the best personal ad. you could put out, I noticed that I was surrounded by young'ens with heels and hair, all dolled up and happenin'. That can only mean one thing; people who really care about first impressions, ergo Freshers!
Right about now there are honestly heaps of internet people telling you what's going to happen at freshers and what you should be taking with you and teaching you more than you'll probably learn in the three years of your course. So, I'm thinking I might as well throw my two cents in too! I've been to uni, I was a fresher once. I'm going to go ahead and say that my words are qualified words and you, dear fresher, should listen. So here's my unofficial fresher's rules. Probably applies to everyone, but not really.

Your morals will be desensitised. You will become a worse version of yourself and that's okay. You will probably steal something of your flatmate's, whether it be a little bit of orange squash when you're hungover to get the taste of vodka out of your mouth and water just doesn't cut it or, maybe a couple of biscuits that they've left out on the side when you're starving and poor, it's going to happen. It doesn't make you a bad person. You will definitely forget something important like salt or oil so you'll steal that too. But it's okay. They'll steal your stuff right back. When that plate you've been missing turns up five weeks later in your pal's room don't get mad, get even. You definitely won't be mad about that missing mug when you're tucking into their block of cheese. There will be much worse things to get mad at, like why you said what you said after your 7th tequila.

You will become a liar. It's the only way to get by. Do you have any mugs I can borrow? No. (hides spare mugs forever). Do you have any toilet roll? No. (toilet roll is expensive). Have you ever had a threesome? Sure. Do you smoke? Yeah, obviously. Was that you smoking in our kitchen? What, no I don't even smoke. Did you get with him last night? No. Did you get with him last night? Yeah. Did you get with her last night? Probably. Do you want to come out tonight instead of stay in with pizza and netflix by yourself? Of course I want to. Where were you last night? Definitely not sitting indoors watching X-Factor with pizza. Lies. All of them lies. It's not a sin, I tells ya. Some of these lies will be told at freshers when you're trying to impress everyone, some of them will be told later in the year when you stop caring about people. Sighs. Everyone does it.

You will live with a Grinch. The one that steals Christmas. As in the one that refuses to chip in for a fake Christmas tree but still eats the candy canes anyway. You'll either all have to suffer so that one person gets no joy for free, or you'll let it go. Probably the former. You might also live with a ghost. I'm not talking creepy dead people walking through walls, I'm talking about that one roommate that you've never really seen unless it's at the early hours. You will go on with your separate lives and you will never even think about them again. (Until you write a blog post about freshers).

There will 100% be arguments with the people you plan to move in with for second year. You might not ever speak to them again. Living in halls is just a cauldron of emotion, with alcohol and hormones stirring the god damn pot. So, I'd say you're pretty bloomin' lucky if you don't end up screaming that you hate someone because they liked the house with the blue sofas over the one that's shorter walking distance to University. Someone once said that the people you meet in your early 20s are often temporary. For the most part it's probably true, but you'll also meet your new besties. So it's swings and roundabouts. It's super rare to find someone who loves all the people they live with first year. It's okay for you to not love everyone. It's okay that not everyone will love you.

Uni life is probably different to what you're imagining. Everybody goes in with a preconceived notion of what to expect, everybody comes out with a completely different experience. No two person's journey will be the same. Some will be expecting something like out of Skins (E4) and get something more tame, probably to do with not having enough money to go out, again. Some will be thinking about knuckling down and having a quiet time coasting but end up at flat parties every night. You just don't know what you're going to get. It's a bit like those boxes you get a museums where you stick your hand in the flap and just have to feel around without being able to see what it is. So just wait until you stick your hand into the metaphorical box and have a good ol' feel about. It's probably not what you were thinking.

This is me, telling you some things that may or may not be useful for the up and coming move into fresher's week. If you have any tips or advice pls leave a cheeky comment below!! I'm in my final year now so am planning to hit it just as hard as any of the youngens! Whether it's your first or last year make the most of it because it's a bloody unique experience. Don't be a Grinch, because I said so.

R.I.P Festival Season 2014

We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of the summer season. This weekend brings Bestival but also brings the end, the goodbye to festival season 2014. There's been some amazing sets (here's looking at you Miss Dolly) and there's been some frankly disappointing sets (ahem, Arctic Monkeys...) and there's been everything in between! A musical roller-coaster of a summer, one might say. It's a tough time, but we gotta let it go (and start planning for 2015, obvs).
My festival experience this year came from Glastonbury; here's some fabulously awful pictures to commemorate the weekend...

Hold up! Let's not get too emotional already, it's not over yet! To prove it, here my top picks of bestival! There's one last dance left...

The main event- I can't tell you enough and I'm sure you can tell me right back that the headline acts are bloody brill! I can't pick a top one between them. Outkast. Outkast!! There are no words. Then Foals, who are just so fabulous. I caught a bit of their set at Reading last year and want more, so much more. Followed by the oh so chic, Chic. (I couldn't not). It's the perfect way to dance your evening away. It's just perfect okay!? I actually can't pick between these three so they share a spot. They're all headliners for a reason.
Have a song from each to get you in the mood (or realise what you're missing out on).

2003 realness: Outkast- Roses

Energetic and emphatic: Foals- Inhaler

Do as you're told: Chic- Everybody Dance

The brilliantly brilliant Indiana is definitely on my radar. I keep hearing her on the radio and I'm not complaining. Her music is right up my street, her voice is hauntingly gorgeous and she just seems proper cool, like she'd be able to take you to the best unknown bars in town. Cool or no cool, her songs are worth a listen. Another artist I reckon will be around a lot more next year, so if you catch her at Bestival you can be one of those dicks that let everybody know you've seen her before she went mainstream. Why not?

Indiana- Mess Around

Although I won't be there this weekend I do have tickets to see the (probably) lovely Mø. I say probably because I've never actually met the woman so I can't determine if she likes cats or not. You never know. 'No Mythologies to Follow' has been the soundtrack to my summer, on repeat any time a little sunshine has come peeping through. I'm desperate to her live, so her date at Shephard's Bush couldn't come sooner! Catch her at Bestival first to get your dance on. Yaaas.

Mø- Slow Love

There are so many other acts I'd have to see, including ones I've mentioned for other festivals (Chvrches, SBTRKT, Sam Smith, Temples et cetera), it's such a ruddy good line up. If I had a spare 200 quid I'd be there in a shot. But I don't have a spare 200 quid, so I'll have to just imagine how good it is. I once went to a Rob Da Bank curated halloween party in Peckham and it was one of the best nights of my life (Rave vs. Hoedown, I can't make that up). So I imagine it's like that one night, spread over an entire weekend. Sighs. 

If you are lucky enough to be travelling to the good ol' Isle of Wight to go to Bestival, and you're not 100% sure of what to pack, check back to my post on Festival sort-of-essentials. It's sort of helpful...

So now we part ways with festivals for another year, it's been fun. Don't stop dancing though! Because I said so.